8 years -No itch, just confessions

I don't know how it happened. -Yes, I'm obviously turning in to one of those 'old people' who makes utterly cliche comments about how quickly time flies by.

I really do feel like time has flown by though. I remember commenting how quickly our first year of marriage flew by. It wasn't the best year. (I had HUGE issues comparing WHO I was to WHAT I thought a 'wife' was supposed to be. Doing that to yourself will make you a loser every time.) On the plus side, Fielding and I still liked each other and thought one year flying by was far better than it feeling like an eternity (like the day that never ends).

I also don't know if it's the time of year (not Valentines Day, but close to Serenity's 1 year birthday), but I feel like I'm a sappy wreck. I keep thinking about how different my life has turned out than I probably would have ever thought it would.

(Wow, I keep wanting to type 'I don't know'. I don't think I've ever thought I know everything...)

Anyhow, I grew up in a house with five sisters -one older and all the rest younger, and two brothers -one older and one younger. You'd think with that many sisters I'd automatically end up being girly. I think that even for a while I was. I LOVED Ballet, makeup, and Barbie. Pretty girly if you ask me.

That didn't last though. I remember by the age of three I wanted to play outside with my brother and his friends. In fact, I rarely had more than one friend that was a girl at a time and every single one of them was a quintessential girl -at least to me. They were all pretty, loved dressing up, and had the fluffiest dresses I could ever imagine. (Yes, I REALLY wanted a fluffy clogging slip with all the ruffles.) Instead of turning out to be a girly-girl, I became a tough tomboy. I hung out with the boys. Played the games they played, fought harder than most of them, and straight out seemed to intimidate any number of them. Suffice it to say, I was not polished and I was not someone they were going to date. (Not that I was ever interested in dating any of them anyhow.)

Oy! If I'm not careful this is going to become a novel no one really wants to read.

Anyhow, by the time I'd gone to college I somehow had decided that people would like me for who I was or they wouldn't. I made some great friends, in addition to some I already had from before. (Yup, pretty much all of them were guys.) And yes, I got lucky enough to become friends with a really great looking guy. (Yeah, I thought Fielding was good looking from day one.) I'm sure you can figure the story out from there.

Anyhow, it still amazes me that we're together. Not because we don't like each other, but because neither of us was really ever interested in 'finding' someone. Let alone finding ourselves with each other. I'm not demure. I will say what's on my mind -sometimes FAR too bluntly than necessary. I'm feisty and have a guys sense of humor. (Again don't know how that happened in a house full of girls.) I have VERY strong opinions about things, but things do not have to be my way (or at least that's how I feel). I'm odd. Very, very odd. Fielding loves me anyway. He sees those things and appreciates them. (Sometimes in small doses). He loves me for who I am. Not just the things other people see, but who I am. The person no one else knows because he has been there for me regardless of the moment. He loved me in oversized tshirts and gym shorts and fancy dresses. He loved me when I'm being mooky or laughing hysterically. He loves me when we're just talking or making out. He loves me because I'm exactly who I'm supposed to be. But the best part is that I know he'll love me yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

And I love him.


Bountiful Temple
February 5, 2005



Wadley Farms
October 6, 2012



10 month -Car Accident 2.0 Merry Christmas

 So, I think I've officially decided that I'm going to get me a shirt that reads "#1 Mom". This is a statement I've said in sarcasm for a couple of weeks now. And yes, that in turn means you're going to hear some terrible confessions from me (or at least some I think make a mom feel like crap).

Hmmm...let's start with the less dramatic, it all worked out stuff. Serenity got Christmas early this year. There was no Christmas tree. (We're still working on getting organized WHILE having a kid. It's not working out so well for me.) We thought we had thrown away Serenity's presents. In our goal of organizing Fielding had thrown out some boxes and I'd put the box with the gifts in it away. I forgot where I had put them and we both thought it had been thrown out. Luckily, I found the box and we decided it would just be better to give her her presents (instead of losing them again). She got a pair of pajamas, clothes, and a nightlight turtle.

Okay, mostly the entire 'craptacular momness' has to do with the SECOND accident in one year. Yes, my daughter is not even one yet and she has now been in TWO accidents with me as the driver. This is the kind of thing that makes you feel like poo as a parent or at least epic fail. It happened Christmas Eve heading home from my parents. We hit ice between the lanes and slammed into the freeway barrier twice then spun around perpendicular with traffic. It sucked. My car died (figuratively. It was totalled.) It was terrible. She slept through it and checked out fine at the hospital. (We took her in as a precaution.) And our carseat did awesome, but had to be replaced.

NOTE: Please slow down on the freeway. At the very least slow down in crappy weather. You have NO idea how frightening it can be facing oncoming traffic after sliding out of control and PRAYING no one else slides as they fly by you while you wait for highway patrol to show up.
NOTE: DO NOT get out of your vehicle on the freeway, at least until the cops show up (or the car is going to blow up).

 Still sucking that thumb.

Shopping at City Center with Gma, aunts, and cousins. I personally like the fluffy headband.

This is her 101 dalmation coat. I think this is what Cruella DeVille wanted. ;)

Photo Op with dad. It took her a while to smile, but one she did...well she's a cheezer.

Marakina gave us a shark towel and we LOVE it. Chomp!

She's still working on hair. If you look REALLY close you can see her whisps.

Happy New Year! Yup, up until Midnight.

Shopping with mom. Okay, mostly killing time, but she reminds me of 'Where the Wild Things Are'.

Well...I tried for one night (unsuccessfully) to try to see if she would not suck her thumb.

It was a bad night, but she liked playing with the socks.

She loves her turtle. It turns three different colors and projects real constellations.

I just liked that she looked like she had spots in the pictures. =)

Six teeth in total. 2 top/bottom and 2 i teeth.

First time in the snow! She loved it!

I plopped her down in the snow and she started to crawl in it.

Such a happy snow bear.

Stuck in the couch.

Oh, she loves Kitty Kitty.

Kitty Kitty is patient with her and lets her pet her pull her ears...a little.

Hanging out with Kayana.

She had a riot and even showed she can drink out of a straw.

Such a happy baby. We're lucky she's as good as she is.

And me, I'm stressing about throwing a party for a one year old.

Mostly because:

A) I hate messes and let's face it, it a party with cake with a baby. It's bound to happen.

B) I REALLY don't want to throw two parties, but that's probably what's going to happen.

C) She's turning ONE. Why do people throw extravagent parties for one year olds?

     -Yes, pictures, but really do we have to invite a million people?

     -There is very little they need giftwise and cost increases the larger the party.

I really wish I could get away with no party or at the very least one without any guests.

That won't happen. Guess I'd just better suck it up and get ready.

Happy Holidays!

Still working

Popped out a kid

Surviving so far

Anything else worthy of note?

9 month -Turkey, tantrums, and sweaters

Officially 9 months old.

Happy First Thanksgiving!

Apparently she has learned to throw mini tantrums.

Maybe there is a way to curb this before it gets too crazy.

She's a thumb sucker....still. *sigh*

But at least she smiles.

I swear I put her to sleep on her back, but she inevitably ends up on her stomach.

She kind of reminds me of a little stink bug. =)

Oh, I LOVE this tiny sweater. One of my co-workers gave it to me as a baby shower gift.

A) It's adorable.   B) It's functional. She's ALWAYS warm in it.

Big Smiles!

 

At church in her holiday attire. The boots seemed to be giving her issues.

She's between sizes right now. Bigger than a one, but still too small for a two.

She's such a goof! But she's growing! She's up to four teeth. Two top, two bottom.

Yup, wearing dad's beanie. It's a bit large though.

She's standing in her play pen.

(Yes, someone invented these as a way to corrall babies and toys into a combined space. What they didn't take in to account is that said baby will just toss the toys out as a 'game' so the parents will continuously have to pick them up and put them back in the playpen.)

Yes, this is the grin I taught her. Obviously, I need to work on smiling 'normally' at her.

See..nice, normal smile.

She loves to laugh and giggle and talk.

See...best little sweater ever!